A Church Alive: Coping with Suicidal Desperation

By Matthew Williams

According to Mentalhealth.org:

·       112 Americans die from suicide each day on average

      112 x 365 (days in a year) = 40,880

      40,880 people die each year from suicide

·       Suicide is the 2^nd leading cause of deaths between the ages of 15-24 years of age.

·       More than 6.4 million people have thought about suicide as an option

As we get started, think about that number, 40,880. That is 40,880 souls that knew no other release from their pain other than ending their own lives. That is over 40,000 individuals that believed their pain outweighed the resources available to them to get help. As we go through this post we all need to know two major things. One, suicidal thoughts or tendencies should never be kept a secret. They need to be talked about! Two, suicide is preventable; we just need to learn to reach out. As faith based communities, we are called to love one another, to reach out and help those in need.

Suicidal desperation has been a source of turmoil in our faith-based communities as leaders struggle with how to cope with their members who suffer from it. Many people still fear that talking about suicide will plant the idea into someone’s head. For starters, someone will not commit suicide because you gave him/her the idea. That idea has already manifested itself over time. In order to reach out properly and diminish that fear we have, we need to learn how to talk to and approach someone who is suffering from suicidal tendencies. Church is the perfect place for this talk to happen.

The Church is the living, breathing embodiment of God’s love for us. It is the source of hope, healing, forgiveness, and charity. These tenants help lend us the tools that a faith-based community should use to help its struggling members find hope and help. Often times the way we approach an individual struggling with deep seated problems, crises or mental illness sets the tone for how that person is going to receive the information we provide them. For example, if you tell someone, “don’t worry, everything will be fine,” it can come across that you are being dismissive of what they are feeling. It is crucial to truly listen and understand what they are relaying to you when you speak to them.

Active listening helps provide the individual in need the comfort of knowing that you are truly listening, understanding and can recall all that they are telling you. This helps build trust and ultimately the feeling of connectedness. Connectedness is one of the ways to help prevent a suicide. It promotes emotional wellbeing that includes belonging to something greater than ones’ self. This can include a community, family friends, and loved ones. Connectedness helps build relationships that has a value that some may not want to let go of.

Active listening can also help identify people in a parish that may truly be suffering from suicidal thoughts. The earlier you can get them help the better the outcome can be. The cost of suicide or even the desperation that comes along with it is often strenuous on a parish or congregation. Being able to navigate through the tumultuous times that suicide often brings can truly help save a life. However, to do this one needs the proper tools. Fortunately, there are programs out there like SOUL SHOP which is designed specifically for educating ministers, church leaders and anyone interested in how to approach and integrate the tools needed to save a life from the desperation of suicide.

Soul Shop is unique as it was designed to help people get through that “dark hour” and live to see another day, or as the founder Fe Anam Avis calls it, “A Second Day.” Soul Shop was built upon seven Key Ideas or Philosophy that help aid in suicide prevention. From, “Suicidal desperation can begin for anyone given an accumulation of losses combined with a reduction in resources to deal with those losses,” to, “As a faith community begins to adjust to the reality of suicidal desperation among its members, it must fundamentally alter the way members deal with one another.”

Soul Shop helps provide the tools necessary to make the greatest impact on those afflicted with suicidal desperation. More importantly, it helps educate the masses so they too can help save the 40,880 souls who lose the battle with their inner struggle annually. REGISTER today for Soul Shop on May 3, 2017.